1981

 1981

No one will touch you, it’s

in your blood like love.

A body the weight of a broomstick

leaning against a wall; a gust of wind would send you falling to the ground

and you would lie there,

just lie there,

with aching bones in full view through paper skin;

crossing over one another like a GRID.

Human Immunodeficiency Virus-

coughing up daydreams,

sweating up hope.

 

Your lover lays beside you,

your name in his mouth and the medical forms.

A death sentence bubbling in your stomach.

Ripples in the bedsheets are like waves

to float on and away,

from this dark bedroom

Into a place where touch can’t kill you.

Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome-

crying at the clinic,

you will never get married.

 

Mom and Dad won’t look you in the eyes,

this might be the last chance they get to see you,

but you are alone in the too-clean hospital,

zidovudine for breakfast.

The curtain is drawn,

and you see the row of beds next to you,

like landing crafts on a Normandy shore.

Some lied to their families

and hid Kaposi’s sarcoma behind a layer of ‘keep smiling'

but you didn’t, now your parents won’t look you in the eyes.

 Human Immunodeficiency Virus-

Your father will bury you,

he won’t attend your funeral.

 

Two clocks out of time,

a body on the steps of the F.D.A,

cardboard tombstone in hand.

‘Where is your rage?’

Stepping over your body,

in suits and riot gear.

They glance to your corpse,

throwing their pupils

a cross the whites

of their eyes like

A Brick In June.

But they will keep walking

Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome-

Silence is Death,

Death is Silent.

 

Your eyelids are scarlet and black and ochre and peach,

tired and held down by greed.

When you ask

‘Why us?’ They will answer

and they will not stop answering.

It’s the only thing they can do,

never telling you how to survive

or how many beds are left in the ward,

but they will look you in the eyes

and pass blame like too tight handshakes.

 Human Immunodeficiency Virus-

You will never graduate.

Acquired Immunodeficiency Syndrome-

Never travel the world.

 

 

 

Your Neighbour Is Dead. The Flower Girl Is Dead.

The Doctor Is Dead. The Grad Student Is Dead

The Milkman Is Dead. The Teacher Is Dead.

Keith Haring, Dead. Klaus Nomi, Dead.

Eric Wright, Dead. Gene Ray, Dead.

Elizabeth, Dead. Nicholas, Dead

Amanda, Dead. Freddy, Dead.

Alexis, Dead. Ashe, Dead.

42.5 Million Dead.

All Are Dead

Silent

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